Perspective…

The emotional mind and the rational mind are like two strong-willed children who don’t always get along. Sometimes they double team me and I find myself doing my best to cull out what really matters the most between them. When this happens, I feel like a sleep-deprived mother who is trying her best to make and keep the peace.

Despite my efforts this week I went up two pounds on the scale. My emotional son greeted me with a slew of disappointment at his heals. That pang of resignation that the body does what it does and in the end, I cannot control as much as I think I can. Questions come up like: What did I do wrong? Was I really being honest about portion sizes? Followed by a made-up narrative like: People won’t believe that I really did follow the plan now that I’ve gained. I sound defensive because I didn’t get what I want.

With this swirl of emotion churning in my brain, my rational daughter cleared herself a path right in the center and began to tick items off her checklist: 1. Did you weigh and measure all your foods? Yes, check. 2. Did you meet your three time-a-week fitness goal? Yes, check. 3. Did you eat mindfully? Yes, check. She ticks through her list sounding more like a metronome clicking methodically back and forth. The voice I give her has a slight air of superiority (as if she were above all the noise that the emotional son was making). Obviously, something needs to change.

Enough!

I say in my best exasperated mother’s voice.

Someone else reading this post may be like, “What’s her problem? Drama queen, it’s just two pounds.” Yes, that’s true. Someone else who is on a similar journey as me may read this post and be like, “That so sucks! It’s so unfair when you put in the work and actually gain.” Yes, that’s true. My point is this, there are so many ways to see the same exact thing. It’s all about what perspective I decide to take.

This is what else I think… I think I need to acknowledge my disappointment because I am human and no good can come of ignoring my emotions. It is unfortunate that it worked out this way for me this week. Plus, I have not sat in my free seat in a while – that makes me sad too. Even though I did my best I didn’t get what I wanted and that stinks. However, this is also an opportunity to rally. I am going to keep at this and I’m going to try some new things.

Things I’ve done so far today to help myself:

  • I used the Elliptical machine at the gym to burn off some negativity.
  • I attended a Yoga class because I have wanted to for a long time now.
  • I thought about the good things the berries and nonfat yogurt were doing for my body as I ate.

As I close out this post, I wanted to share my new perspective on my current situation. I have decided to celebrate that I have been maintaining my weight within this “healthy” zone since November 2018. For the past three months, I have stayed in this weight zone and that feels amazing.

Maybe my body is just following its own rhythm. Who knows? One thing I do believe for sure, had I not been actively working to maintain a healthy lifestyle I could easily slip back into old habits. Old habits that would compromise my health and wellbeing.

This is the story I am telling the emotional and rational voices in my head just like tucking two children into bed. It is a story of the good winning out over the bad. That is why I will keep at this, even though sometimes it is hard to do. I will keep at this because I respect and love my body. I will keep at this because I can do amazing things. So can you. So keep at this will me. Is a journey not a destination. Thank you for reading.

Influence…

I am thinking about what influences me. As I reflect on my interactions with my family and friends, the books that I read, my colleagues at work, and all the media I consume all have an impact. The decisions I make influence me also. Every choice leads in towards or away from success:

  • Do I pre-pack and track my meals for the next day the night before?
  • Do I go to bed early so I can make a spin class in the morning?
  • Do I stay up later and keep working?
  • Did I plan what we will have for dinner?
  • Do I have dessert tonight?

It’s all the little choices that have a big influence on the direction I take. So I plan on celebrating every choice I make that will render a positive influence. Tomorrow is weigh-in day, and of course, I am more than a number on the scale! However, I also believe the number is feedback on how I am doing.

I blog the truth. The truth is I really hope I make it within my two-pound range tomorrow. I will have 39 roll over points at the close of this week. That’s amazing. I made my fitness goal. That’s amazing! I included a variety of foods and made smart choices that left me feeling satisfied and not deprived. That’s amazing! I even took time to get a manicure on the way home from work today because I wanted to do something nice for myself. That’s amazing too!

If I don’t make it. I will be disappointed but I will not be deterred. I will keep working and doing my best. Right now, I’d love it if you promised to do the same. In my mind, I imagine that you say, “I will too!” We can do this, let’s go.

Encouragement…

I’m thinking about the things I am grateful for as I get ready for bed. I can’t express enough how much it means to have a kind word of encouragement. Isn’t amazing that we all of have this enormous power for good within us? Of course belief starts from within, but it’s just so nice to have someone else come along and back you up.

Maybe that’s why I love teaching. I love being that voice that says, “Let’s try it.” or “Wow, look at what you’ve done here.” or “May I just give you a compliment?” My students all know that I believe in them. I think that understanding helps them to work so hard even when things are difficult. I think we could all take a lesson from the children in our lives. They know a thing or two about overcoming struggle and living joyfully.

Joy and struggle are two sides to the same coin, aren’t they? Today I pushed myself to get to spin at 4:30 pm and I did it. It was a struggle to make it out of school and to the gym on time. Usually, I let myself get caught up in work or a personal commitment. Not today! I feel really good about this. Plus, I am also rolling over 4 SmartPoints which also feels pretty fantastic.

I think dreams are just as important as reality. Having a dream to strive towards, is helping me to discover how much I can really do. I’m just so grateful I am figuring this out. I could have lived my whole life and never have known what I could become had it not been for my dreams.

If you have something you are dreaming of – keep it safe, keep it close to your heart. If you have someone in your life who has a big dream – be an encourager. Be the one who says, “Yes, you can do it.” The truth is, you can do it – whatever “it” might be. It just takes a lot of work and dedication. I guess the one question you have to ask yourself is, are you willing to put in the time it takes to make a dream happen?

Be the light, be the hope, keep the faith.

Appreciative…

I read a blog post that made me think today, Running 4Meyer called Baby Steps Are Boring. It made me think about all the little things I have done to set up the strong habits that are helping me today.

Beginnings are hard because there are not any results yet – just the hope it will work. Hope is essential to the process of weight loss but so is discipline. Saying “No thank you…” to tempting foods (especially when I’m stressed) is not so easy. It has a lot to do with my “baby steps” that laid the foundation I rely on to make weight loss happen.

I say, celebrate it all. Celebrate the crawling it takes before you take that first step! Today I am rolling over 4 SmartPoints. Woo Hoo! I did not get into spin class for 5;15 am. I was Waitlisted so I withdrew my name. I’m going to try to go after work. I’m not sure if I can pull that off but I’m going to try. Step-by-step I can do this and so can you.

Brisk…

Busy, busy, busy. Today moved along at a brisk pace. A lot of things came together and jived from morning till now:

  • I made spin class at 5:15 am. There were three people there waiting to get in – isn’t that amazing? So many people are so dedicated to their health goals. This is very inspiring to me.
  • Work moved along well and I felt productive and good about what I was able to complete.
  • Dinner went over well, 9sp chicken with pasta and tomatoes. Everyone seemed to enjoy it. Plus, I am in the Blue Dot zone, that always feels good.

I am doing some great work keeping my goals in the forefront. I am working out, tracking, eating mindfully. I am prepping my foods and trying some new recipes. These are all choices I am making to help myself. What have you been doing for yourself lately?

In case you’re wondering about my featured image… it is Brooklyn, New York. At the end of the month, I’ll be going to school there for training. I’m nervous about it because it’s something I’ve never done before. I am working on a plan for how to handle it. Right now, I just feel a little queasy about the whole thing. Anyway – Brooklyn, I’ll see you soon.

Yoga…

I came into work and was greeted with a nice surprise this Monday morning – Yoga. As part of a health initiative my school is offering a yoga class before school. Luckily I could do it. It was a lot of fun, and was a really nice way to begin my day. I have to figure out how to do yoga more.

Short post tonight, because I’m off to bed so I can get up and go to spin class tomorrow morning. Wish me luck.

Accomplished…

Any time I do something that helps me to get closer to my goal I feel more accomplished. The journey to weight loss is not easy, but figuring out how to make it work is a gift unto itself. Every day there are food temptations, there is all this other”stuff” that gets in the way of working out. Often times I don’t only want one glass of wine I’d like two… know what I mean?

So, on days like today, I have to celebrate that all that I’ve done to get closer to my latest goal – getting back to my free seat. The only way to move down the scale and closer to my goal weight is to maintain my resolve and stick to my plan. Here is what I did to help myself today:

  1. I went to 8:30 am spin class and it was a lot of fun. I felt good about it all day.
  2. I stayed within my points range and I’m on track for rolling over 2 SmartPoints.
  3. I bought the latest WW magazine that offers up some really nice recipes that look for delicious and fairly simple to make.
  4. I cut up vegetables and bagged them so they are easy to grab and go.
  5. I packed my breakfast and lunch for tomorrow.

Here is what I plan to do to help myself for the rest of the day:

  1. Do my deluxe night time routine (as I like to call it) just add on facial cream and some mindful breathing lol.
  2. Lay out my outfit for the morning.
  3. Go to bed by 10:30 pm or 11:00 pm so I get plenty of sleep.

When I can pull this all off, I feel really accomplished.

Strategic…

A strategic stance is just what I need to persevere through this next week. I am .8 away from my free seat and I am determined to get it back. My plan of action will be:

  1. Build each meal around zero point foods. Click Tips & Tools for access.
  2. Create a meal plan I plan on using Paprika (it’s a really neat app).
  3. Reflect daily on how it’s going by blogging here.
  4. Practice mindful eating using the Headspace app it is part of my WW membership (it is also very good).
  5. Remember that even though I’m creating this action plan, it’s ok to be flexible. Changing my plan isn’t a failure it is being responsive.

I am optimistic that by next week, I will be within that two-pound range for my goal weight. That does mean a number goal of losing .8 pounds. Wait, isn’t it bad to have number goals now? Absolutely not. WW never said it was bad to have a number goal. They said there are other victories besides quantitive ones. As far as I’m concerned, once I’ve planned and executed these steps I’ve already won.

I think it helps to think of the number as feedback. Feedback is neither good or bad, it’s informative. I did this… and this was the result… I get into trouble when I personalize that number when the number becomes a reflection of my self-worth. If I’m trying and failing I am already winning. My resilience stems from my ability to adjust my plan and take further action that eventually leads to success. Does that make sense to you?

Good…

On reflecting on my week, I did… good. I didn’t work out as much as I would have liked but all-in-all it was a good week. I stayed within my SmartPoints range. As a matter of fact, tonight I’m rolling over four points.

I will forever be a work in progress. I’m fine with that. I hope I always have something to work on because I’m a learner. I want to grow and be more today now than I used to be. That said, I also embrace where I am right now because it is all process of becoming.

Carol Dweck said that we like to believe that really talented successful people were born different than the rest of us. We tend not to believe that our idols are, for the most part, ordinary people who made themselves extraordinary. I guess that would be a reminder of how it’s so important to keep striving.

No…

Sometimes the answer is “No.” I had professional development and I was surrounded by candy. I looked at and then I said, “No.” I snapped a picture and moved on. It was difficult in the moment (I realize that it doesn’t look so great, but it was very appealing in the moment).

Then later I went to dinner with friends. I said no to the unhealthy choices and went with grilled chicken over salad. It was delicious. I really enjoyed it and after I was happy. The evening was about friendship, not food. Sounds simple, but it was an NSV for me.

Funny, sometimes saying “No” is saying “Yes” to me.