Day Two Hundred Ninety-Two…

There is something so meaningful about starting something and seeing it through to the end. I set a goal to blog every day for the duration of one school year. Tomorrow is the final day of that goal. Amazing.

As I reflect on all that has changed for me since I began I realize that I:

  • have lost 82.4 pounds. That’s equivalent to 2 four-year-olds!
  • can workout at a very high intensity during spin class for the entire class!
  • can wear all of my old clothes that have not fit in YEARS! (except for one pair of Guess jeans I haven’t worn since I was 17).
  • enjoy plain Greek Yogurt (really and truly).
  • am more mindful and reflective than I have ever been before.
  • regard myself as a bonafide writer, I live a writer’s life.

People see me and ask me how I did this incredibly difficult thing. I can tell, they long to do it too. It makes me wish I could just whisper the secret in their ears and then it would all work out. I have actively stopped saying “It’s a lot of work.” The thing is, it’s not that – “It’s valuing myself as much as I do everyone else.” I imagine that sounds phony to others but it’s really the truth. I deserve a few minutes to pack my lunch and weigh out my yogurt if that’s what it takes.  I deserve some time to myself at a spin class before going to work. That time is for me self-caring for me and I matter too.

Words of Wisdom

So do you, you matter. Find out what you love and do that for yourself. If you want to lose weight take time to get to know yourself. Love yourself and you can still eat the food you enjoy. Find a community and be part of it be there for others and they will be there for you. I hope my words reach you because I understand what it is to long for change, and to have change feel so out of reach. You can do this, just committ.

I will not reach GOAL tomorrow and that’s ok. This was never really about a number it was about realizing my self-worth. More tomorrow…

 

Day Two Hundred Ninety-One…

We went to Cheesecake Factory tonight which is pretty funny because the last time I went there was on the very first day of this blog. (Day One…). It feels so good to have some choices, to be out, and still stay on plan. This is my choice because I want to get to goal more than to eat a piece of cheesecake. I did have three small tastes thanks to my family and that was enough (for the record I counted them as 3sp).

Cheesecake Factory
Chicken Enchiladas 13sp

I am scheduled for spin at 5:15 am and I am looking forward to hitting my activity goal for the week. These are the little decisions that I am making to better my life.

Words of Wisdom

I no longer come at my weight loss journey from a perspective of scarcity and that’s an important shift. In other words, I don’t think this way,  I can never have what I really want because there aren’t enough Smartpoints to accommodate cheesecake. Now I look at it like this, I can go to Cheesecake Factory with my family and still enjoy my meal and I am still likely (because you never know how the scale will perform on weigh-in day) to have a loss for the week. I can have it all. 

Well, maybe I can’t have it ALL but I can choose what I really want. What I really want is to get to goal. More tomorrow…

Day Two Hundred Ninety…

I may not have beat my countdown clock to get to goal but today, officially marks the day where I no longer have any clothes that don’t fit me:

I feel amazing about fitting into this shirt. Wearing this shirt represents a long-term goal that has come to fruition. Wearing it now gives me a great sense of accomplishment. I never thought I’d fit into this shirt EVER! It’s just so remarkable.

I’ve been thinking about my progress and how I’m making this happen. It sounds so unlikely but it’s the little goals that are getting me there, it’s the small attainable goals. If you’re wondering what that looks like, an example is my current short-term goal: to roll over points two days in a row. So far, I rolled over 4 points yesterday and am on track to roll over another 4 points today. It’s not really about rolling over points it’s about setting my mind to something and making it happen.

Spring at goal
This is what greeted me when I left spin class this morning.

Try it, you’ll see it’s a great feeling. What short term goal will you set for yourself?  Once you have one take an extra moment to write it down. Why?  Your goal is more likely to happen when you write it down. Before you know it you will accomplish something big. Something that you may not have thought you’d be able to make happen and that is an amazing feeling.

Words of wisdom

Day Two Hundred Eighty-Nine…

If you had to name your top three tips that help you stay on plan, what would they be?  For me, it’s planning, tracking, and getting activity. Overall, It’s a better day for me than the past two days. I will be rolling over points and am feeling satisfied. I have prepared breakfast, and lunch for tomorrow, it’s pre-tracked, and I am scheduled for 5:15 am spin class. My clothes are laid out, ready to go. These are the behaviors that have helped me to lose over 80 pounds. There are no quick fixes (at least not for me). The secret is in the day-to-day decision making and consistent routines and reflection that are helping me to be successful. The more successful I feel the more vested I become in this process.

You can do this too. The best way to get started is just to do that – get started. Don’t wait, because there is no point in waiting. Reflect every day on your journey and believe that you can do this too. More tomorrow…

 

 

Day Two Hundred Eighty-Eight…

Old habits are very stealthy and can creep back in. I noticed myself slipping up today. I wanted ice cream and I had some for dessert but then I had more. I tracked it and owned it and now I am done with my extra points for the week. It’s not so much the ice cream, it’s the behaviors of wanting more. I think the behavior warrants my attention.

old/new

The thing is this journey will never be over for me. I know this and some days more than others that truth can be hard. Sometimes I wish I could just be like everyone else and just eat what I want without over thinking it. Then again, everyone struggles with something. For me, food will always be something I have to be careful about. I am learning more, but I still have more to learn.

Words of Wisdom

I went to the beach and had a nice time. I am so appreciative of my new found energy and overall sense of wellness that my weight loss has afforded me. This is worth the effort, I am worth the effort. More tomorrow…

 

Day Two Hundred Eighty-Seven…

I was standing in line at Panera, searching for a cookie that would not break my SmartPoints bank for the day.  Yay, I thought I can have a Petite Chocolate Chip Chipper Cookie for 5sp! They probably won’t have Chocolate Chip Chipper Cookies My inner thoughts grumbled and I actually felt my eyebrows furrowing

My eyes swept up and down the glass case. It was clean, shiny, and presented the bakery items in a most appealing way. There it was, a Chocolate Chipper Cookie and there was only one left. Wow, I thought that looks pretty substantial that’s not bad at all for five points. I promptly ordered it up, paid for that and my son’s ridiculous Kitchen Sink Cookie. No sooner had I got to the door to leave when I turned to David and said, “Wait, that sign didn’t say ‘petite’ did it?” 

That’s the way the cookie crumbles, The regular Chocolate Chipper Cookie was not a good choice for me at 18sp. Then I tried to rationalize by breaking it in half (8sp) still a no go, then into a quarter it would be 4sp and that wasn’t worth it because I know I would’ve wanted more. I had myself a pity party and wined and complained saying how unfair it was that they made a cookie so many points. If you’re on this journey you’ll understand this special kind of disappointment.

Then, I thought of my husband working all day and said to my son, “Looks like daddy is getting a cookie.” I put it into the cool box and I drove to Dairy Queen. I bought myself a fudge bar for 2sp and enjoyed it immensely. To be clear, it didn’t look at all like this picture:

Screen Shot 2018-06-16 at 5.17.55 PM

This was the right choice for me today and that’s all that matters. These are the day-to-day choices that I have to make if I want to get to goal. Yes, it’s the beginning of the week, and I could’ve had the stupid cookie. The thing is, my why is more powerful than, my desire to eat the cookie.

If you’ve never experienced Long Island in the summer, you really ought to come and visit because it is magical. This place is a summertime baby. It is so picturesque and it just calls out to barbeques, cocktails, beaches, and laid-back good times. I went out last night to enjoy some music from a local band. I was dressed in sandals, my size 6 jeans, and a flowy shirt with fancy sleeves and a flowery design. I felt pretty. I felt confident. I felt comfortable in my own skin. That is all part of why I am doing this. This is how I was able to say no to the cookie and yes to the fudge bar. It’s not about depriving myself of foods that I love, it’s about giving myself the gift of the body I want to have at this phase of my life.

So if you are struggling go back and think about what you really want. Write it down, hold it close to you that is really how you get the motivation to get goal.

Day Two Hundred Eighty-Six…

Right now I am grateful for sunny skies on a Friday in June, as I take a few moments for myself here in my cheerful yellow bedroom and to reflect on my week.

Words of Wisdom Contentment

Things to celebrate… I made great choices when I went to the retirement party last night. In terms of food, I decided which I’d rather have, pasta or dessert. Dessert was the winner.  In terms of activity, I made the choice to dance instead of standing on the sidelines. Unfortunately (and this makes me a little sad) this would probably not have happened 81 pounds ago. And when I saw someone smirking at my lack of rhythm I just smiled back because I just felt happy. I can’t help but think about something one of my students shared. He told me that his dad tells him to “Choose happy.”  Very wise, and good advice for us all.

Yes, I choose happy. Even when there are stressful times and when I find myself struggling with one thing or another. Today was a brutal day at work, and there was more than enough stress to go around. It’s not personal it’s just stuff I have to get done. However, I’m proud of myself for becoming more comfortable with delegating work to others. That’s something to celebrate as much as my good choices for weight loss because that means I’m growing.

I think things are opening up for me on a bunch of different levels. To me, it seems as though I’m all in on this amazing weight loss secret. It’s like when you discover something obvious that you missed because you were looking at the wrong thing. Then when you see it you can’t believe you didn’t see it before.

But then again, maybe it’s not so obvious. Maybe you have to be willing to take the journey and it has to be revealed to you over time. Last night one of the retirees introduced me to her mother. She is a lovely woman who is also a Weight Watcher, she feels stuck and said, “How’d you do it?” I started to talk about the program and how when I really followed it I lost weight, but more than that it’s the motivation to keep going. I talked about how writing makes it possible to keep me in touch with my “why” She listened but I think she was counting the white ball she was missing the gorilla.

Self-awareness is a product of growth. Whether it’s admitting when you make a mistake or discovering something really amazing about yourself. It’s about being open to learning and change. What do you think? Are you ready to make a change?