Enough’s Enough…

I’ll be the first to say that I am not perfect. The past three days have been awful on plan. Here is what I’ve been up to.

  • Tuesday: Deciding to eat very light because I overate yesterday (disaster)
  • Monday: Buying a a variety of foods (that worked until I was watching TV)
  • Sunday: Telling myself a story that I can make different choices (true but only if I take action)

Why did I let this happen? I don’t know if this is rational but I blame sugar. On Easter I ate a bunch of candy and cupcakes. I have not eaten that much sugar in a long time and I think it flipped a sugar switch in my brain and I lost it Now I feel bloated and uncomfortable.

How will I made tomorrow different? First day thinking. I am going to declare a “Do over!” and here are the steps I’m going to take:

  • Act as though it is my first day on WW it works if I work it.
  • I am not going to let myself get hungry. I will boomerang back to overeating if I do.
  • Mindful choices I am going to make thoughtful choices and eat without distraction.

I’ll let you know.

Good Food…

Getting back on track after a holiday food blitz is easier when I have a nice variety of foods available. Here are some interesting and different foods I bought when I went food shopping:

  • Shishito peppers (awesome when grilled)
  • Wild salmon
  • Naan
  • Young coconut
  • Millet
  • Fresh mozzarella cheese / fresh basil / tomoato

I am thinking about why I went so crazy yesterday with the food.. Maybe I’ve been falling into a food rut lately. I need to eat a variety of foods and when I really think about it, lately, I’ve been eating from a limited selection. So I figured some new food options would shake things up a little. Today I toasted some Naan. A full piece racks up some SmartPoints (SP) at 6 SP per piece (I had 1/2 of a piece for 3 SP) but it was delicious and so worth it. I think I made a good choice by balancing it off by having it with zero point turkey breast. The turkey was roasted in the oven and that was a change too.

I guess my final words to leave you with is to get some variety into your diet and to eat good food.

Too Much…

Today we celebrated Easter and I did so eating anything I wanted. The day began with making Deviled Eggs out of our Easter Eggs. I know the irony is not lost on me either.

Then I picked on candy for a while. Which gave way to preparing dinner. It was a delicious dinner. We had scalloped potatoes, fresh ham, roasted carrots, and peas, crescent rolls for good measure.

Then we had bunny cupcakes for dessert. All very cute, sweet, and fun to eat. To say I overdid it is an understatement. Now, I’m sipping on ice water, and I have that “I ate too much” feeling.

Tomorrow is going to be an important day. Tomorrow is the day I leave the Easter eating in the past, and return to my healthy routines. I am scheduled for 9:30 am spin, and I think it’s going to be a little rough. I’m going to try to eat light and I’m already thinking I’m going to cut up veggies for a fresh vegetable platter to keep in the refrigerator. That’s the kind of helpful planning that helped me to lose and maintain a 93 pound weight loss.

My Kindness Mantra…

You are worth all the effort maintaining weight loss takes. It is ok to take time to plan, to weigh and measure foods, to focus on you and what is important to you. The stronger you are, the better you can take care of yourself and everyone else that relies on you.

In times of stress and worry it’s easy to put your needs on the back burner. Try not to do that, because you are important too. Treat yourself as you would someone who you really love. Self-love is not selfish – it is kindness turned inward. You can do this and just remember how remarkable you are.

This note is for me, and you. Weight loss is a difficult thing, maintaining it is also difficult, so remember that if you get down on yourself. You are doing something difficult but it’s something you are doing just for yourself.

Tonight and Tomorrow…

Every day is not going to be good. When I was losing the bulk of my weight I had many days in a row that were, on point. Now that I’m maintaining some days are good to go while others I just go rouge. Lately I feel like I’m pulling from one extreme to another.

It was a beautiful spring day.

It doesn’t help that I’m worried about some things in my life. But that’s life. That’s the way it goes sometimes. I am going to keep doing my best, remembering that my best is pretty damn good. I bet yours is too. I am going to keep at this – living a healthy lifestyle and maintaining my weight loss and it helps me to know that there are others like me who are doing the same thing.

Tonight, this feels hard to do but tomorrow it will probably feel easier.

Write Your Own Rules…

I don’t think I ever fully appreciated the phrase, “that was a lucky mistake” before. It’s been my experience that it’s just no fun to make mistakes. There are lots of negative feelings that accompany them, feelings like, shame, embarrassment, fear, and vulnerability. Do you think it’s possible to move past these negative feelings and feel grateful for the mistakes you’ve made? How would looking at mistakes through a lens of gratitude be beneficial? I wonder, does it always have to be that way? I’m starting to think it doesn’t have to be that way, I think I can write my own rules when it comes to mistakes. I want to be more generous with myself, I want to lean into being more reflective and honest. I want to use my mistakes as a stepping stone for growth.

This week’s goal to be mindful during bedtime rituals and making sure I get enough sleep is going so much better than last week’s goal to roll over SmartPoints. Now I know, nurturing goals are working better for me. For where I’m at, right now on the journey, focusing on taking care of myself is more helpful. I only know that because I made a mistake last week.

So I used 47 SmartPoints today. Crazy. You may be thinking, ok that’s the real reason she’s writing about mistakes… But here is a little history lesson about my family. One of our traditions is that we spend St. Patrick’s Day with my brother and his family. All us “kids” get together have a great time and part of that is sharing a delicious meal. No one is left out; there is no drama, just good times. WW is teaching me how to do that and still be successful on my weight loss journey.

In my past a 47 SmartPoint day might have derailed my entire week. That’s not going to happen this time, I have learned from that mistake. I now understand how to avoid that outcome. That’s growth, and that self-discovery and that is a very big deal. How’s it going? What mistakes have helped you to grow? My advise, don’t run from mistakes look at them as an opportunity to learn, I think it’s just better that way.

Deconstructing Secrets…

After attending my WW meeting this morning, I am left thinking about some important issues. Today’s conversation reminded me that even though I am healthy and fit, I still have a lot of issues to work out. This week has been a challenging one for me, and there were times when I didn’t track, weigh, and measure my food and that is concerning to me. Maybe that’s why the group’s discussion lead me and another member to talk about what it is like to feel a loss of control over the process. We talked about the fear of “gaining it all back” and (for me) the public shame that would accompany that if it were to happen.

Gaining back the weight is a common fate for so many of us. Here is the thing, I think one reason that may happen is because once the weight is off it feels as if the problem is solved. In reality, the problem that caused the weight gain is most certainly not “solved”. I know because I can see some patterns now that were more elusive to me in my past. Now I see that most times, when I start picking and eating food mindlessly, it’s usually a stress response. Sometimes, when I feel like I need some kind of external comfort I turn to food, it’s a conditioned response. A coping mechanism that provides some relief in the short term but in the long term really hurts me. To some of you these insights may not seem like big revelations; however, they are for me personally. That’s what matters.

Weight loss and maintaining it is really difficult. Some days are harder than others. I tell you this because I don’t want anyone reading these posts to think I’ve got this all figured out. I don’t want anyone thinking it’s easy for me, or that I have the benefit of some special talent for this. It’s not that I have some kind of secret that I can sell. I write these posts to inspire myself and hopefully anyone else who decides to read them.

So here comes the inspirational part of my post for today. There is so much we can do to help ourselves be successful, we have a lot of power. Accessing this power in times of need comes down to three simple steps:

  1. Take a beat to engage self-awareness over what is happening in the moment allowing yourself to become mindful of your actions, thoughts, and feelings. Think of it as being a quiet observer.
  2. Then take aim and be strategic by executing control over something. Select one thing to say yes or no to and see how that makes you feel. Be thoughtful and present be mindful.
  3. Win, lose, or draw make a choice. It doesn’t really matter if the choice you make is good for your weight loss efforts or hinders them. The point here is that by acting mindfully you are waking yourself up to a making an informed choice.

The word mindful is key to this recovery plan but it is not synonymous with success. The function here is to uncover what you’re doing so you can think about why the behavior is happening.

Goals, Refresh, Repeat…

Here is what I know about weight loss,

  • It’s not easy so don’t feel bad about failing
  • It’s not quick so don’t feel discouraged if it’s taking a long time
  • It’s not a one size fits all solution so do take some time to figure out what you need to be successful

You are worth the effort so keep trying.

Goals & Mindfulness…

Being mindful means becoming more aware within the moment of doing something. I’d like to work on that as part of my goals. I think being more aware of my internal and external experiences would help me on this weight loss journey. Becoming more present and mindful would deter overeating because overeating is an escape. Mindfulness is like the exact opposite trying to escape. This is just what I’m thinking about.

Friday Reflection…

In terms of my weight loss and maintenance goals it was a great week. I achieved my fitness goal: I went to spin class three times. In terms of food, I will rollover 35sp. today and I did not feel deprived or hungry. Plus, there are a few little moments that happened during the week that I can celebrate:

  • I was mindful about what I chose to snack on my ride home today. I went with a (very) small apple instead of a snack bag of chips.
  • Two days ago, I read my action plan that is hung on my refrigerator and that helped me to realize what was really going on – I wasn’t hungry I was stressed in a moment.
  • I reflected and worked on some strong emotions about a disappointing relationship

Well, it’s no wonder I’m so tired! Busy week, and a lot to deal with. I am just glad to be home on this cold March night and am looking forward to getting some good rest. I weigh in tomorrow and I think my efforts will be reflected on the scale, but even if they aren’t I had a great week.