Tag: #reflection

A Little Help From My Friends

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Happy New Year readers! The holidays have come and gone, and looking back it seems I’ve been collecting unpublished blog posts in my Drafts Folder. This one is different. It is different because this post is inspired by friendship…

Here is the story, I began a conversation in a group text of friends to complete a challenge: let’s share one positive thing we have done for ourselves or for others for the first two weeks of 2024. Christening the new year with shared positivity felt like it would manifest even more of it for the coming year. My friends agreed, and soon after we all started sharing photos and accomplishments to cheer each other on.

Today, my friend Keri suggested that we make three lists: What will you leave in 2023? What will you take with you from 2023? What will you start in 2024? I love this idea, so I figured I would share my lists, and gift my friend’s idea to any of you who might want to use these questions as a way to reflect on your lives.

What will you leave in 2023?

  • Trying to please everyone
  • Overthinking possible outcomes
  • Expending too much energy on negative people
  • Picking apart my physical appearance
  • Procrastinating
  • Avoiding hard conversations

What will you take with you from 2023?

  • Spending time with my sister
  • Daily weigh-ins
  • Drinking 64 ounces of water each day
  • Food tracking
  • Exercising every day
  • Meal planning
  • Mindful eating
  • Attending Weight Watcher meetings
  • Reading for pleasure
  • Writing blogs
  • Decluttering
  • Walking Sadie with Dave
  • My sense of humor

What will you start in 2024?

  • Keep to a weekly budget
  • Get up earlier during the workweek
  • Practice active listening every day
  • Strength training

What will this year bring? That is the mystery that has yet to unfold. So in the meantime, I want to spend my time focusing on loving my friends and family and continuing to strive for personal growth, knowing that this life is a gift.

It’s a Beautiful Day

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The rain has come calling on this August day. Outside rainwater is collecting on the backyard furniture until it spurts off into tiny rivers. They rush into the grooves of the table, eventually gathering back together to form micro waterfalls that plummet and splash onto the pavers below. The sun is hidden from our view as if she has left on some exotic holiday. The grass and the leaves are a healthy dark green in sharp contrast to the grey cloudy sky. Outside the world is sighing with relief for this beautiful day.

Strategy #7: Shifting Perspective to Gratitude

Having a sense of gratitude for what is right here right now is one way to maintain a positive mindset during (and beyond) a weight loss journey. I keep a Gratitude Journal where I write five things I am grateful for every day. It keeps me grounded in positivity and turns off the negative critic in my head – I told you about her already, let’s not wake her up. This is something I am doing for myself, and I find it really helpful, you may too.

This journal is my cue to write 5 things I am grateful for.

Redesigning My Life for Weight Loss to Happen

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Habits are a funny thing because they seem so obvious to everyone. When a behavior is repeated with a high degree of frequency over time it becomes a habit. If the behavior is easy to do and requires little effort or thought the more likely it is to become a long-lasting habit. It is all pretty basic. Some people rail against the idea of forming habits to lose weight because it all seems too Pavolov’s dogs, or rats chasing after cheese in a maze for them. I get that but here’s the truth. The truth is everyone already has habits even if they are not conscious of them.

A Day in a Life of a Weight Watcher

Here is a story I’ve heard before. A woman closes up her kitchen for the night and then sits in a favorite chair. She enjoys winding down her day by reading a book. After a while, a snack craving happens. She tries to ignore it but eventually succumbs getting up and going back into her kitchen, thinking to herself, “I closed the kitchen.” to make herself a snack. As she is doing it she may even be thinking, “I should not be having a snack. I’m not even that hungry.” Then she eats the snack (or snacks) as she reads her book. She has mixed feelings of reward and disappointment, chalking it all up to a lack of willpower. This happens night after night and is sabotaging her weight loss. The root cause is not a lack of willpower, this is an example of an unhelpful, unconscious, habit.

Strategy #4: Habits are Helpers

It’s easy to read along with this and say, well ok Captain Obvious. It’s obvious to us right now because we are not the ones experiencing the cravings, or anticipating the rewards that habits bring with them. I’ve been that woman, and I can tell you for sure, it wasn’t obvious to me. I know at least some of you reading right now are doing this same behavior too. So how do we get rid of unhelpful habits? We wake up to them and then we redesign our lives.

I was able to redesign my habits to get rid of snacking at night but I noticed I had not been reading. I love to read fiction, and I need to read nonfiction for work if I am going to stay abreast of the latest educational trends. So I redesigned my life with a helpful habit.

  1. I included reading for 20 minutes a night on my habit tracker.
  2. Each day I think about a convenient time to read for 20 minutes. Sometimes it’s during lunch, or in the evening, I like having flexibility.
  3. The reward comes from two things: checking off the habit on my tracker (because it’s a habit I want to create) and the act of reading itself.

Habits happen either way. Will you make them your friend or foe? I am telling you it’s not fate, you get to make that decision. If you master your habits you can get anything you really want. This is true for weight loss, and anything else. Think about this because I am telling you are your greatest resource if you know how to tap into your power.

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If you’d like to purchase this habit tracker go to my Amazon List

Being Rich

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They say you should write about what you know, so this post isn’t going to be about financial security. I’ve never been, am not, and most likely will never be – rich – in a monetary sense. My experiences reside with definition number 2…

Strategy #3: Use an Abundance Lens

What if we viewed weight loss using a lens of abundance rather than scarcity? Instead of focusing on what we need to give up in order to lose weight, let’s focus on all that we are gaining during the process. How would that change the experience of weight loss? Here is what I now know:

  • I can eat what I want to until I am satisfied
  • Understanding that food tracking is about self-awareness
  • Daily weight fluctuation is normal
  • Activity brings strength and resilience to the body
  • Daily reflection improves the quality of life

This all may sound matter-of-fact to some. However, there is a giant gulf between knowing and believing. I believe everything I have written, and I could not have discovered this without my weight loss journey. Now I have this incredible gift of perspective that I can lean into it when times get tough. I am learning how to believe in myself.

While I would definitely enjoy being rich in the monetary sense (some money would be really nice) and who knows… maybe someday… hey a girl can dream. I do have a deep appreciation that perhaps my riches are being granted in the form of wisdom. I am learning how to tap into my own personal power to achieve my goals and that is something I am hoping you discover for yourselves, dear readers.

Making Lists

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Reflection is a critical thing to a weight loss journey, and having a community in which to share is invaluable. I know enough now, that I don’t want to go it alone because I think better in the company of others. Here are some reflections members shared today when thinking about what is working for them when it comes to losing weight:

  • “Setting small goals really helps to motivate me to keep going.” To this, I say, “Me too!”
  • “Weight Watchers meetings help because this is the only place where we can talk about this issue for an hour with people who get it.” I can only say, “Same!”
  • “Tracking my points, even when I am over, is helpful because I can make them up as the week goes on.” If you saw me at the meeting, you’d see me shaking my head, whispering”Agreed.”

With the good comes the bad. We also did some work exploring what isn’t helpful when pursuing weight loss:

  • “Letting myself get too hungry. When I get too hungry, I’m in danger of overeating.” (that was my reflection).
  • “Not planning ahead when going out with friends.” It’s so easy to fall into unhealthy eating and drinking patterns when going out socially. We have those behaviors ingrained and it’s easy to lose control.
  • “When I don’t consistently track what I’m eating.” Food journaling is the number one habit that successful weight loss revolves around. Not putting food into our trackers is just another way to kid ourselves. It’s like we don’t want to see it but it’s not at all helpful and it just hurts our efforts.

Making a list of helpful/unhelpful behaviors for weight loss is a great vehicle for reflection. It clarifies a plan of action so that we can all get a little closer to reaching our goals.

No Matter What

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The bravest thing we can do is to surrender to the understanding that love is our most powerful expression of self. All the fear, anxiety, and anger are really subordinate emotions there to protect us from rejection or disappointment. I think all these emotions are bundled up and intertwined like chains that keep us back from reaching our full potential.

It’s hard, to be honest about what made me gain back some of the weight that I lost. It would be lazy thinking to say, “It must be genetics.” Don’t misunderstand me, I’m certainly not diminishing the role of genetics, we are all built differently, and that is a good thing. There are so many ways to be beautiful, I don’t believe we were ever designed to look or be one way in this diverse world. Diversity is the vanguard of a healthier, more evolved, better planet. What I am saying, is that I know myself. I know when I feel more at home in my own skin. I feel physically stronger and mentally clearer when I am in control of my weight. Rediscovering this truth is both painful and beautiful. Painful, because I let that slip away; beautiful, because I have the wisdom to recognize it.

I think that maybe weight gain is just another layer of protection. Food can transport us back to happier times when (if we’re very lucky) to carefree days of youth, family, security, and traditions. The food we eat tells stories of our roots. So in that way, we can time travel back through eating. We can share our stories through food, food can even be an expression of love. Really, don’t you think it’s playing it safe to show or experience love through food? I’m not kidding myself, for me, I think all of that has to do with why I gained back weight – carrying the weight of the world literally on my back (and everywhere else).

This is a heavy thing, to say no matter what for the rest of my life, I am going to do all that I can to lead with love – even if that means I am rejected; even if I fail; even if it means love is not returned back to me. It’s not just about weight loss, it’s about becoming someone more evolved than I am today.

Vetting Habits for Weight Loss

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I encourage you to vet your habits to see if they are serving you well on your weight loss journey. It is a simple litmus test, long-lasting habits share three important qualities:

  1. Little Time
  2. Little Effort
  3. Have Close Proximity

To provide some context for this topic, here are three of the daily habits that are working well for me.

Successful Habit #1 Daily Weigh-In…

I weigh myself each morning: It takes a minute to do this. There is little effort I get on the scale and record my weight on my WW app. My scale is by the dining room table not far from where I pour my morning cup of coffee.

Successful Habit #2 Drink 64 oz Water

I space out drinking the water over time so it is easy to take sips throughout the day. My water bottle dries overnight next to the coffee machine so it is convenient to grab in the morning. (I’m noticing a pattern around coffee lol).

Successful Habit #3 Food Tracking

I use an app on my phone (the Weight Watchers App). I can scan bar codes, or type in items, it takes little time it is convenient, and my phone is always on hand.

All of these little habits are making weight loss happen for me. If it is working for me, chances are really good it will work for you. If your journey isn’t going so well, it could just mean some habits need tweaking. Weight gain is a complex issue and yet weight loss rests on having a network of simple habits.

Weight Loss in the Real World

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Someone said the most amazing thing this morning, “I’m eating pizza and beer and I’m still, losing weight.” That is the secret to making a lifelong change. No one should have to stop having fun or doing social things with friends just to lose weight. Issues with food are especially complicated because food is both necessary and social. I’m happy to say, as a member of WW I am really learning how to strike that balance.

When it comes to weight loss it’s easy to be overwhelmed, if you don’t have the right mindset and tools. When making decisions about how to lose weight, be sure to find a program that offers education about nutrition and the benefits of being active. Learning how to: counterbalance eating out, recipes, and meal planning, portion sizes, and understanding what macronutrients are and why they matter.

Not all calories are created equally – what a person eats is used by the body in different ways. A bowl of cereal may be as many calories as a slice of avocado toast, but the avocado toast will be more filling because of the macronutrients.

Celebrations Happen…

Today is a special day for my family. It is my 34th wedding anniversary and the 25th birthday of our twins. There will be eating out, there will be cake and a glass of wine. Looking back I know where I lost my perspective about food, stress and convenience were big factors that lead to weight gain for me. Thinking about the future, I am filled with gratitude for the people who support my weight loss efforts, and I hope these blogs are useful to you in yours.

Changes

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Here is a moment from my day to celebrate. Instead of ordering out with the girls, I ate the lunch I packed from home. The great part is that I didn’t feel as though I missed out on anything. I really enjoyed eating with my friends, and I still stayed on track. There have been times when it wouldn’t go this way. I felt good because my health and wellness journey is important to me. I want to make a positive impact on my life and it’s working. I feel better, even if sometimes it’s difficult, I am proud of myself for maintaining my resolve.

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Honesty & Negativity

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February 18, 2023, was fourteen weeks ago. I have worked out every day for the past 14 weeks. In that time we have changed seasons, moving from winter and are headed toward the end of spring. I can (mostly) keep up with my Peloton classes, and I feel much stronger and more fit and that feels like progress. At the same time, I feel like all the extra weight I am carrying around with me, has amassed in my torso. So while I feel my muscles working I also feel like they are completely submerged in excess fat. So even though I feel good when I’m working out, I’m also a little bummed out.

Now, I find myself asking lots of questions like: Why did I let myself gain so much weight back? How long will it take to not feel so heavy? When will I see a decrease in my waist size? None of these questions are very helpful but this blog is a place, to be honest, and these are thoughts I’m having today. I would rather share them, and look at them than let them keep playing unchecked in my head. I think by reflecting on these negative thoughts, I can disempower them and relegate them to the background instead of letting them have center stage.

None of these feelings steal my joy of working out every day. I am so happy I am making time to do that and the habit is well-established now. There are ups and downs on a weight loss journey (hahaha I just read that back) but you know what I mean. Feelings are fleeting and the most important thing to do, when dealing with negativity, is to be honest about it – feel the feels and keep going.