Tag: #WW

A Little Help From My Friends

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Happy New Year readers! The holidays have come and gone, and looking back it seems I’ve been collecting unpublished blog posts in my Drafts Folder. This one is different. It is different because this post is inspired by friendship…

Here is the story, I began a conversation in a group text of friends to complete a challenge: let’s share one positive thing we have done for ourselves or for others for the first two weeks of 2024. Christening the new year with shared positivity felt like it would manifest even more of it for the coming year. My friends agreed, and soon after we all started sharing photos and accomplishments to cheer each other on.

Today, my friend Keri suggested that we make three lists: What will you leave in 2023? What will you take with you from 2023? What will you start in 2024? I love this idea, so I figured I would share my lists, and gift my friend’s idea to any of you who might want to use these questions as a way to reflect on your lives.

What will you leave in 2023?

  • Trying to please everyone
  • Overthinking possible outcomes
  • Expending too much energy on negative people
  • Picking apart my physical appearance
  • Procrastinating
  • Avoiding hard conversations

What will you take with you from 2023?

  • Spending time with my sister
  • Daily weigh-ins
  • Drinking 64 ounces of water each day
  • Food tracking
  • Exercising every day
  • Meal planning
  • Mindful eating
  • Attending Weight Watcher meetings
  • Reading for pleasure
  • Writing blogs
  • Decluttering
  • Walking Sadie with Dave
  • My sense of humor

What will you start in 2024?

  • Keep to a weekly budget
  • Get up earlier during the workweek
  • Practice active listening every day
  • Strength training

What will this year bring? That is the mystery that has yet to unfold. So in the meantime, I want to spend my time focusing on loving my friends and family and continuing to strive for personal growth, knowing that this life is a gift.

Sustainability

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Yesterday began with a hearty breakfast after my Saturday morning Weight Watchers meeting. We discussed how important it is to make our healthy lifestyle choices be sustainable. If we want to live the rest of our lives eating healthy, then we have to learn how to eat what we want but within limits. Feeling inspired, and thinking about the Belgam Waffles in my freezer as featured in yesterday’s social media post to my group:

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10226578251616684&set=gm.1302000540682814&idorvanity=563000671249475
Facebook, Greenlawn Goal Setters

I was satisfied, and really felt proud of myself, go me! I can eat what I love and still lose weight. Later in the day, I was feeling hungry again – I did a quick body check and it was legitimate internal hunger:

I walked into the kitchen and there on the toaster were the bakery cookies that were left over from my son’s birthday party Thursday night. I stood there thinking, “You’re going out to dinner with friends later. If you eat a cookie that means you are going to have to balance it out with a lighter dinner choice. You are going to see a show too – which means you may want a fancy cocktail…” Even after all that thinking, I was reminded by the meeting – “if this is going to be sustainable (for the rest of your life) if you want cookies you need to be able to work them in.” I tracked and ate four bakery cookies.

Of course, that wasn’t a strategic choice, it was an emotional choice. I was watching a Halloween show, and I wanted the cookies. I wanted that sense of sweetness and Halloween at that moment. I knew what I was doing and I was alright with my choice.

All would have worked out except, when I did go to dinner later, the food was not good, so I really ate very little. I went to the show Beautiful (it was so great if you have not seen this musical and you love Carol King, do see it). Once there, I did get a lovely seasonal cocktail with a fancy apple slice and Tito’s vodka that also went into my tracker. But, by the time I got home hours later, I was very hungry! And because I was so hungry, I did not handle that situation as well as I could have. I ate a bowl of cereal with skim milk, two enlightened bars, and 2 bags of Utz Halloween Pretzels with 3 thin slices of smoked gouda cheese. In the end, I felt a bit defeated and went to bed.

This honest reflection of my day and real awareness is the thing I want to celebrate this morning. In the past that could have been way worse. Worse, because I would have had a blind spot to what I was doing, and I would have most certainly eaten more. That would have been followed by a great deal of shame for being so weak. Now I see that it’s not weakness it was genuine unchecked hunger.

I have one more thing to share. Many years ago I read Geneen Roth’s book, Women, Food, and God, her Eating Guidelines were a game changer for me:

“The Eating Guidelines
1. Eat when you are hungry.
2. Eat sitting down in a calm environment. This does not include the car.
3. Eat without distractions. Distractions include radio, television, newspapers, books, intense or anxiety-producing conversations or music.
4. Eat what your body wants.
5. Eat until you are satisfied.
6. Eat (with the intention of being) in full view of others.
7. Eat with enjoyment, gusto, and pleasure.”

― Geneen Roth, Women, Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything

If you have a curious mind, you may want to try eating mindfully today. If your experience is like mine, you may find it’s easier to tell when you’ve eaten enough. You may also be more aware of the physical sensations of what you’re eating feeling more present during the experience.

It’s a Beautiful Day

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The rain has come calling on this August day. Outside rainwater is collecting on the backyard furniture until it spurts off into tiny rivers. They rush into the grooves of the table, eventually gathering back together to form micro waterfalls that plummet and splash onto the pavers below. The sun is hidden from our view as if she has left on some exotic holiday. The grass and the leaves are a healthy dark green in sharp contrast to the grey cloudy sky. Outside the world is sighing with relief for this beautiful day.

Strategy #7: Shifting Perspective to Gratitude

Having a sense of gratitude for what is right here right now is one way to maintain a positive mindset during (and beyond) a weight loss journey. I keep a Gratitude Journal where I write five things I am grateful for every day. It keeps me grounded in positivity and turns off the negative critic in my head – I told you about her already, let’s not wake her up. This is something I am doing for myself, and I find it really helpful, you may too.

This journal is my cue to write 5 things I am grateful for.

Redesigning My Life for Weight Loss to Happen

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Habits are a funny thing because they seem so obvious to everyone. When a behavior is repeated with a high degree of frequency over time it becomes a habit. If the behavior is easy to do and requires little effort or thought the more likely it is to become a long-lasting habit. It is all pretty basic. Some people rail against the idea of forming habits to lose weight because it all seems too Pavolov’s dogs, or rats chasing after cheese in a maze for them. I get that but here’s the truth. The truth is everyone already has habits even if they are not conscious of them.

A Day in a Life of a Weight Watcher

Here is a story I’ve heard before. A woman closes up her kitchen for the night and then sits in a favorite chair. She enjoys winding down her day by reading a book. After a while, a snack craving happens. She tries to ignore it but eventually succumbs getting up and going back into her kitchen, thinking to herself, “I closed the kitchen.” to make herself a snack. As she is doing it she may even be thinking, “I should not be having a snack. I’m not even that hungry.” Then she eats the snack (or snacks) as she reads her book. She has mixed feelings of reward and disappointment, chalking it all up to a lack of willpower. This happens night after night and is sabotaging her weight loss. The root cause is not a lack of willpower, this is an example of an unhelpful, unconscious, habit.

Strategy #4: Habits are Helpers

It’s easy to read along with this and say, well ok Captain Obvious. It’s obvious to us right now because we are not the ones experiencing the cravings, or anticipating the rewards that habits bring with them. I’ve been that woman, and I can tell you for sure, it wasn’t obvious to me. I know at least some of you reading right now are doing this same behavior too. So how do we get rid of unhelpful habits? We wake up to them and then we redesign our lives.

I was able to redesign my habits to get rid of snacking at night but I noticed I had not been reading. I love to read fiction, and I need to read nonfiction for work if I am going to stay abreast of the latest educational trends. So I redesigned my life with a helpful habit.

  1. I included reading for 20 minutes a night on my habit tracker.
  2. Each day I think about a convenient time to read for 20 minutes. Sometimes it’s during lunch, or in the evening, I like having flexibility.
  3. The reward comes from two things: checking off the habit on my tracker (because it’s a habit I want to create) and the act of reading itself.

Habits happen either way. Will you make them your friend or foe? I am telling you it’s not fate, you get to make that decision. If you master your habits you can get anything you really want. This is true for weight loss, and anything else. Think about this because I am telling you are your greatest resource if you know how to tap into your power.

habit-tracker-getting-to-goalDownload

If you’d like to purchase this habit tracker go to my Amazon List

Being Rich

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They say you should write about what you know, so this post isn’t going to be about financial security. I’ve never been, am not, and most likely will never be – rich – in a monetary sense. My experiences reside with definition number 2…

Strategy #3: Use an Abundance Lens

What if we viewed weight loss using a lens of abundance rather than scarcity? Instead of focusing on what we need to give up in order to lose weight, let’s focus on all that we are gaining during the process. How would that change the experience of weight loss? Here is what I now know:

  • I can eat what I want to until I am satisfied
  • Understanding that food tracking is about self-awareness
  • Daily weight fluctuation is normal
  • Activity brings strength and resilience to the body
  • Daily reflection improves the quality of life

This all may sound matter-of-fact to some. However, there is a giant gulf between knowing and believing. I believe everything I have written, and I could not have discovered this without my weight loss journey. Now I have this incredible gift of perspective that I can lean into it when times get tough. I am learning how to believe in myself.

While I would definitely enjoy being rich in the monetary sense (some money would be really nice) and who knows… maybe someday… hey a girl can dream. I do have a deep appreciation that perhaps my riches are being granted in the form of wisdom. I am learning how to tap into my own personal power to achieve my goals and that is something I am hoping you discover for yourselves, dear readers.

Doing the Work for Weight Loss

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There is a lot to be said for just doing the work of weight loss. Don’t overthink it, don’t agonize over negative self-talk, and don’t let little things distract you from the big picture – reaching your goal. Strong habits and systems alievate all of that worry and angst. I think that is my big takeaway after a few days of challenge.

I started teaching a four day a week elementary reading and math program. It is a terrific program, and I am already really so fond of my students. I am very happy I signed up and was selected to do this; however, the up front work of planning has been very time consuming. I was worried that this might be the “thing” to derail my systems and habits.

What I’ve come to realize it is that my systems and habits are the “thing” that saved me during a highly stressful time. Everything is so automatic now, I don’t have to think about what to do, I just do it. There are no decisions to make in the day-to-day, other than deciding what to eat or how to workout. The tracking of food and activitiy is embedded into what I do it requires no thought and little effort.

Here are some things that I’ve been doing all week:

  • I kept going and finished the work and I did not sacrifice my fitness goals
  • I took some time to eat foods that I had planned and made sure to keep hydrated.
  • I allowed myself to lean into my habits to help me stay on track during a stressful time.

I have written this before, but still I feel the need to write it again; I am grateful for my weight loss journey because it continues to teach me about myself.

Follow Your Heart

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It has been an emotional few days. I am the kind of person who has unconsciously used food to soothe negative emotions like stress, fear, or sadness. Now that I am more self-aware of this misguided habit, I can say I have grown wiser about emotional eating. However, this wisdom does not help me with the pain I feel at this moment.

For better and for worse emotions are part of life. Maybe the best thing I can do is to name what I’m feeling. Right now, I am sad because I miss my son. He is living his life. He is happy, safe, and loved, and for all of this, I am (truly) grateful. This is helping me because now I see that it’s not just sadness I feel it’s also gratitude; but more than that it is love.

No Matter What

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The bravest thing we can do is to surrender to the understanding that love is our most powerful expression of self. All the fear, anxiety, and anger are really subordinate emotions there to protect us from rejection or disappointment. I think all these emotions are bundled up and intertwined like chains that keep us back from reaching our full potential.

It’s hard, to be honest about what made me gain back some of the weight that I lost. It would be lazy thinking to say, “It must be genetics.” Don’t misunderstand me, I’m certainly not diminishing the role of genetics, we are all built differently, and that is a good thing. There are so many ways to be beautiful, I don’t believe we were ever designed to look or be one way in this diverse world. Diversity is the vanguard of a healthier, more evolved, better planet. What I am saying, is that I know myself. I know when I feel more at home in my own skin. I feel physically stronger and mentally clearer when I am in control of my weight. Rediscovering this truth is both painful and beautiful. Painful, because I let that slip away; beautiful, because I have the wisdom to recognize it.

I think that maybe weight gain is just another layer of protection. Food can transport us back to happier times when (if we’re very lucky) to carefree days of youth, family, security, and traditions. The food we eat tells stories of our roots. So in that way, we can time travel back through eating. We can share our stories through food, food can even be an expression of love. Really, don’t you think it’s playing it safe to show or experience love through food? I’m not kidding myself, for me, I think all of that has to do with why I gained back weight – carrying the weight of the world literally on my back (and everywhere else).

This is a heavy thing, to say no matter what for the rest of my life, I am going to do all that I can to lead with love – even if that means I am rejected; even if I fail; even if it means love is not returned back to me. It’s not just about weight loss, it’s about becoming someone more evolved than I am today.

Finding Freedom

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I don’t want to think of my weight loss journey as being something separate from my life. What I mean is, I don’t want to say, “Well I’m on vacation so I will just have fun, and forget about following my Weight Watchers plan.” There is a subtle but destructive message in that thinking. This kind of thinking assigns something punitive to being on a weight loss journey. As if I cannot have all the fun I want and still be cognizant of how many points I’m consuming. This is a false narrative because I can be on vacation, be on plan, and have a great time.

Some might be thinking, “She has gone off the rails! Don’t drink the Kool-Aid!” I think, what I’m doing is, finally coming to my senses. I don’t want to be a prisoner of weight loss. That sounds hyperbolic but if I look back, I see that it was always black-or-white thinking. I was either good or bad; on or off and in that way, the prison I found myself in was by my own design.

A vacation would become a tripwire; after eating and drinking freely coming home to stringent routines would marginalize a personal sense of power. “See I gained ‘x’ amount of pounds, I can’t be trusted with my own decision-making.” A weight loss journey comes down to making choices. I am learning how to trust myself to make choices that will allow me to live a full life and improve my health not just when I’m in my controlled environment of home but anyplace.

Love is the Answer

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Most people have trouble losing weight. The most obvious reasons are: it takes a lot of time, a lot of effort, and consistent motivation to make it happen. Sometimes it’s not hard to stay in control (I’m in touch with healthy habits, and I feel good about where I am on the journey), and then other times it can seem doggedly difficult. Maybe I look at a picture and think, “Ugh… am I even making any progress?” True story, I felt that way just this afternoon.

There can be weeks of steady improvement followed by days of struggle. It is as though there is an on/off switch inside my head. Right now the switch is on for healthy living, but past experiences have taught me not to take that for granted. Something is nagging me I keep returning to these questions: “What changed?” How did I get back on track, and how did I lose the resolve from last time?” I really do like how I feel when I’m in check with healthy living, and yet (just like turning off a switch) falling out of step with these habits can happen in a snap.

Why? I think the change (for better or worse) hinges on subtle cues that activate behavioral responses. Today’s unflattering picture is a good example. On one hand, it might trigger me to drop my healthy habits, “Ugh.. might as well eat ice cream.” The other scenario might be, “Wow, it’s a good thing I am working on myself, keep going.” But really both scenarios are examples of negative self-talk. That is something to pay attention to and to work on.

The saddest part about this is when my family looked at the picture they said, “Look you have a genuine smile, you look really pretty.” When they see me, they just feel love. All of the anxiety and vanity tied up in needing to lose weight can cloud all perspective. Now that I think about it this post isn’t really about being fearful that I’ll lose my healthy habits. This post isn’t about me feeling upset with my physical appearance. Those are distractions, my weight loss journey is about so much more than habits, anxiety, and vanity. This is a journey to learn how to love myself for who I am right now, and to strive to evolve to be more today than I was yesterday.