Fighting the Battle …

Somedays are harder than others and today is one of those days. There was this delicious Carvel chocolate dipped ice-cream cone in my freezer. This blog is a place for the truth so I decided to that I should go ahead and have it. This is not a diet, there are no foods off limits. I can eat it if I want to. As I was taking out the cone from the paper bag, I was thinking, “I’m having it I want it.” Then I heard myself say, “Eat it but track it.” I laid it out on the table and looked at it, as I was keying in the letters…

c-a-v-e-l-i-c-e-c-r-e-a-m-c-h-o-c-o-l-a-t-e-d-p-p-e-d-c-o-n-e

I wasn’t able to find it so I began to scroll down checking out some of the other comparable choices 12, 14, 20 SmartPoints… I sighed, and thought about it because my goal this week is to be more present and intentional about my choices. I thought about how I practiced mediation this morning before getting out of bed. I thought about how I’m not really hungry. I thought about how far I’ve come, and how hard it was to get here. I put the cone back into the brown paper bag and slid the freezer door shut.

Why did I want the cone? Could be that I have some work to do that I don’t want to do right now. It could be that since I am feeling good physically I can fool myself into thinking that I can just eat whatever I want in whatever amounts. I might be thinking it’ll be fine, I can eat that because look at me I look good. It could be so many reasons. I think the more important thing for me to consider right now is how hard it was to say, “No.” to it. That was really hard in the moment. The moment is passed and now it feels easier, but in that moment, I had to really work hard to maintain my composure to think through it.

Day Three Hundred Ninety-Five…

No, I did not get to goal.

Progress October 6 2018

I will get there just not today.

I’m not worried, or disappointed. Well, when I first found out,  standing there next to the scale that I went up.4 pounds, I know I made a “face” but after that, I was really ok. It’s not that 1.6 pounds are going to make a difference in what I’ve accomplished or how I feel it’s just a marker of the accomplishment. It’s to say, “Yes I did this.”  That said, this is not to say this isn’t important to me.  It is really important for me to achieve this milestone.

With all the many changes to the program, I am grateful that WW understands the value of keeping Lifetime Membership because it’s something that I’ve aspired to for such a long time – years.  Just the word “Lifetime” means so much. This morning, as I attended my workshop, I listened carefully as a Lifetime member, Theresa, shared how she will always have to be mindful about her food choices. This is my truth too. My old habits are there and will never fully leave me. Last night I looked at the Klondike bars in the freezer and thought about how many points one would be. I didn’t eat it but the desire was still there. A desire that (for me) stems from living with so much stress.

Anyway, be well on the journey. Believe in yourself and know you can do this and then you will.

This is what living on plan looks like: