Day One Hundred & Twelve…

 

Pre-Meeting…

I woke up really early at 6:05 am. Just about a full hour before I had to and now I’m ready to go to my meeting and I’ve got an extra 20 minutes to spare. I don’t want to go downstairs because I won’t drink any coffee before weighing in. Which reminds me, do you want to hear some of my ridiculous rituals? On weigh-in day…

  • I will not eat or drink anything before stepping on the Weight Watchers scale
  • I wear my lightest clothes that I can stand to wear in public because you know…
  • I will only weigh in on one scale once I get there
  • I bring my notebook every week and if I forget it I feel a little out of sorts.
  • I have a little mantra… “It’s not about the number. It’s not about the number. It’s not about the number.” 

These may seem crazy to people who do not have a goal to lose weight because, in truth, these rituals are crazy. For instance, this morning, I stood in my basement holding two different shirts in either hand to see which one felt heavier than the other.  That’s nuts!

I think the reason why I have these superstitions are that while I can control a lot as I go through the journey, I can’t turn a dial on the scale to get a specific number.  So, if the number doesn’t match my perceptions of what I “deserve” then I’m bound for disappointment. I also realize that the notion of deserving is skewed too. I think that numbers make this about winning and losing and that’s a problem. This is not what the journey is about for me. I did everything I could this week to become more self-aware, I wouldn’t change a thing. If a number is less than that it doesn’t define me or my efforts. So, I’m still working on this.

Post Meeting…

I did it! I made my goal in December! I had a personal goal to get back to the weight I was at a year ago and I did it! My Saturday Morning Weight Watcher group was amazing! Everyone was so supportive and just very happy for me. The thing is, I have felt those same feelings for them. I tell you, get a tribe to do this work with. I will be happy to be on your team because there is no reason that we all can’t get to goal.

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This is the second time I made it to 50 pounds but this time is truly different.

Thank you for reading, I appreciate you and wish you only love and joy as we get closer to the day we celebrate God’s love for us. More tomorrow…

 

 

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