Day Sixty-Nine…

I can’t help but love November. I bundle up and the cold air envelops me like an old friend. As I walk down the street I breathe in wood smoke knowing it will permeate my hair as it whips in and out from under the hood of my jacket. My hands buried deep in pockets and I am instantly reminded of childhood. I would spend hours raking leaves for the sole purpose of jumping into them. Throwing them up in the air with my head turned upward to watch them dip and sail back to earth. I think my ongoing search for beauty in the world, comes from a desire to get closer to that kind of appreciation for nature:

It was the first really cold day. We drove into Northport Village and were greeted with blustery winds and white caps:

Tomorrow is my weigh-in day.  I had a devil and angel on my shoulder as I thought to myself, “What will you do if you stay the same again? What will you do if you don’t get a big number? How will you feel, if after all this careful planning and work you lose a pound?”  Instantly another thought came to mind, “Well then that’s another pound off that will not come back. If you could trade a big weight loss number for how you’ve been feeling, would you do it?  No, no you wouldn’t Jennifer. You deserve to feel good about everything you’re doing for yourself. Don’t let fear and doubt cloud your intention.”  This was my thought process, and I think it is important to be transparent about these things if this blog is going to be an honest portrayal of my journey to goal.

Like an angel and devil on my shoulder

After that exchange, I did try on a bunch of clothes and some things fit that didn’t fit last week!

Weight Watcher Pro Tip: I just polished off 1/3 cup of Pistachios for 3sp and I can say that is a handy little snack to have. It takes a while to eat them and they are delicious.   

Thank you for listening and all the encouragement. I can do this, and so can you; all we have to do is work at it and be patient.


Day Sixty-Eight…

I woke up at 4:30 AM and went to spin class, and it was packed! It’s amazing how many people start their day off with exercise. I do feel stronger. Although, I have to say some negative thoughts did creep their way into my morning workout.

I can do this.

Since the class was so full, I was in the first row (where the mirrors are) and I kept looking at myself, thinking – “That’s it. I feel like I should look different.” This was not a helpful thought process but I can’t help it. It’s the truth, that’s what I was thinking about.  Fortunately, as I got into the workout that thought process changed, and I starting to think about how to hold the positions to workout the muscles in the right way. By the end of the class, I felt strong and validated:

Good Morning
The view walking out into the parking lot.

I had a great teaching day. It’s amazing to witness the moment when a student learns something new. Then, I had to stay after school and provide professional development on the reading continuum.  It went well, everyone had a good conversation but boy-o-boy it was a long day. By the time I got home, the sun had set and I was getting pretty hungry. I handled dinner well I got chicken kabobs with a baked potato from our local Greek diner.  I  even had a scoop of Baskin Robbin’s ice cream. I hit my target point range and earned a blue dot for the day.

As we move deeper into autumn I am feeling more in control and even though sometimes I feel impatient about my progress,  I realize that these are just feelings, and I need to experience them and then move on.  If we are lucky, we get to learn new things too and that is part of the journey.