Last year at this time, I was looking good. From the outside, it seemed like I was well on my way to goal. A leader invited me, and yes I actually did this, to take a twirl in front of everyone at my meeting. That felt amazing. Yet on the inside something was brewing, I was beginning to disengage. A change was happening and no one, not even me, knew it. Where did I go wrong? I keep thinking about a member’s Facebook post:
“I need to get my mojo back! 0 ambition to be on plan. How do I get it back?”
I understand this member’s distress on a visceral level. Even her word choice, “mojo” makes perfect sense. The word “mojo” implies a magic charm – how scary is that? Is ambition to lose weight some mystical presence that can enter or leave us at will? Sometimes it certainly feels that way. I’m not going to dwell on this, but it’s something I’m thinking about so it’s probably something I shouldn’t ignore.
I have the power within me to do this. The hell with the odds, I say yes I can make choices that will get me to my goal:
There is no magic charm that will grant me access to change. It’s just brute effort and reflection that will get me to goal. Yikes, that sounds awful when I read it back. What else is different from last year? This year I am actively seeking out beauty and inspiration, from myself and the world. I believe we all can draw on inspiration and beauty to stoke positive energy. The world is so full of both and is waiting to be found.
To me, these leaves are both beautiful and inspirational because when I look at them, I am reminded of the transformative power of time and patience:
Perhaps that just the message I needed to hear today. Tomorrow, on the other hand, is weigh-in day. I hope my reaction is better than last week. I hope I can be happy if my weight loss I less than I think I deserve. I hope that I can learn to have some grace and appreciate where I am right now in the journey.
Let me leave you with these words they are, well, inspiring…
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